Lost Love Letter One

"Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it" 
-Song of Solomon 8:7


Hey

I know you need your space
but if you don’t hate me
then I’m hoping you’ll at least
let me write to you

The more time that goes by
without us talking gives you
more time to
believe
that we shouldn’t be
together

I’m not saying you don’t know
yourself and what you want
I’m sure now that you do
You’re more confident than ever
in what you want to do and what

direction
you want
your life
to go

But you’re still wrong in thinking that ending us is the best thing for you or me

When you got married
you had dreams of
marriage
kids
and a
family

Even though it didn’t work I don’t think you’ve given up on that dream

and for a while
you wanted
that dream
with me

I know it’s not what you want
right now
but its still a dream you have
for someday

You’ve just altered it for a while
and you have no regrets about it

I would like to open up a restaurant
but I've told you that
if it happens now
30 years from now
or not at all
it would be for the right reasons

The right reason is being with you and there are no regrets in that

No restaurant or city is more important than you
My family’s love for me is already everlasting
no matter what I do or where I go
and they know that I want
to be where you are
and go where ever you want to go
I want to support you in every dream you have
and be there beside you when you make them come true

That is my dream now because you are the most important person in my life

Our love didn’t happen overnight
and being in love again the way we were
isn’t going to happen overnight either
but falling out of love doesn’t happen that quickly

Don’t tell me you don’t love me anymore
I know it’s not that easy for you to stop loving me

I always knew that no matter what we had
you still cared about him
and something inside of you
would always love him

I can live with that if that’s what it means to love you

At the same time
something inside of you
still loves and cares
for me

and what we had was more
special and
unique and
amazing
than any love either of us
have ever had before

The side of you that still loves and cares for me
knows that there’s hope for us
for you to love me again
for me to become the man that you want in your life

I will become that man with no regrets
It’s all I want to do with my life now
I can do this and we can be together
and work through everything else
we may go through

If what I just said makes it sound easy
I know its not
I’ve got a long way to go
to become
all I want
to become
just like you do
but I’ve started on that path

the one that will bring me back into your life and let me walk with you again

I just want one more chance
to build our lives together

I love you with all that I am
I'm sorry with all of my heart and
I ask you to give me one more chance
I will ask until the answer is yes

then my words
my actions and
my life
will show you
that I will love you
forever

Please write back or call
I love you

Lost Love Letter Two

"Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
-1 Corinthians 13:7-8


Hey

Despite all the hurt and pain I put you through
remember all the good times and memories we have together

Showing me your Arizona
Showing you my Hawaii
Road trips to Mackinac Island and San Diego
Losing ourselves in Starved Rock
Finding ourselves on Valentine’s Day
Cooking dinners together at your apartment 
Spending time playing with the kids
Walking the dog in the snow and rain
Meeting at the lakefront where we first touched

Tickling each other in bed and laying in each others arms
Falling asleep together and waking up to lovemaking and kisses

All those times are still inside of you
knowing that things were good
Things can be that good again
and things will be even better
now that I realize all that I have

When you wanted me to see the beauty of Arizona
or any place that means something to you
I was looking at them the wrong way
I tried to see the same beauty you see
in the mountains and the desert 
but I was looking for them to touch me
the same way they touched you

When they didn’t I thought Id never be able
to feel their beauty
inside me
as you do

I realize now that these places
will never mean the same thing to me
as they do to you but
I also realize that I was
looking in the wrong direction

I should have been looking at you

I was trying too hard to find the beauty in the view
when the real beauty of these places
was standing right next to me

I know you light up inside
when you’re in a place you love
I know your heart is light
and your soul is at peace
when you’re somewhere
that means the world to you
All I had to do is look at you
to see how happy you were
and that’s more than enough
for me to love those places too

That’s all I want for you
all I ever wanted for you
to be happy

but I also want to be happy right there with you

I can be happy anywhere you are and anywhere you want to be
because I know that I won’t be happy anywhere without you

When he and you were falling apart I told you that
you should still try to communicate with him
and do everything you could before
you walked away

I’m asking you to do the same for me

Before you left for Colorado
around my birthday
I thought things were good
I knew it would be hard to be apart
but we had made plans to be together
and I took comfort in that
Throughout this relationship
we made plans and promises
to each other

If you had doubts about us then why didn’t you say anything

I was going to miss you but
I was trying to be strong
for my sake and for yours
Even if the doubts grew
after you got to Colorado
you should have told me then
I know you wanted me to come out early
but I thought we would be fine when I couldn’t
You never said anything about your doubts
If I knew you had doubts then
I would have been out there as soon as I could
I would have made all the time in the world
for you and me to work things out
so that it wouldn’t get to this point
of us not being together

I’m sorry I didn’t see it then
more sorry than you could imagine
but I see it now and I still believe
it’s not too late for us

Just remember all the memories we have and think about how many more we can make together

I’m sorry for hurting you
I love you more than life itself
and please set your doubts aside
to give us one more chance

Please write back or call
I love you

Lost Love Letter Three

“Turn yourself to me, and have mercy on me,
For I am desolate and afflicted.
The troubles of my heart have enlarged;
Bring me out of my distresses!
Look on my affliction and my pain,
And forgive all my sins.
Consider my enemies, for they are many;
And they hate me with cruel hatred.
Keep my soul and deliver me;
Let me not be ashamed, for I put my trust in You.
Let integrity and uprightness preserve me,
For I will wait for You.”
-Psalm 25:16-21


Hey

Too many nights have gone
by without hearing your voice say to me
goodnight and I love you
before I fall asleep

I thought in time things were supposed to get easier
but they just get harder and harder for me
You said in time I would realize
this is the best thing for you and me
I don’t need time to know that it isn’t

I’ve lived life enough to know that you are the best thing for me
and I still believe that I am the best thing for you

I’m never going to find someone who loves me like you do
You take care of me and make me take care of myself
You argue and yell at me when I need to hear that I’m wrong
You let me be weak with you which makes me stronger
You put up with my faults and love me unconditionally
You hold me, kiss me, and make love to me when I want or need to feel your love

And most of all
you let me do all these things for you

You let me love you
love you as much I could
more than I ever thought I could
You showed me how to love you even when I thought I couldn’t
I have become a better man for loving you and being loved by you
and being away from you has taught me how to love even stronger
strong enough to be free to go where ever I want for love

For love
I want to go to you
where you are
where you go and
where you want to be

I can never forgive myself for ever hurting you
this time and all the times in the past
But please don’t let that shut me out from you
I never want to drive you away from me
but if it feels like I’m pushing
I won’t anymore

Please understand though
I need these letters to you
I need to keep writing to you
to get it all out
that maybe you’ll hear me

If you choose to read them
and care nothing for them
or if you choose not to read them at all
at the very least I put these all out there for you
It’s what I feel I need to do

And despite what you may think
my family would love to see you
especially the kids
They keep asking me about you
and it takes all my will to keep myself
from breaking down when they do

I pray to God that you’ll choose to see me
and deal with me face to face

Ill be waiting for you and if you let me
Ill make a way to stay with you forever wherever you want to be

I’m sorry for hurting you
I love you no matter how you may feel about me and

I pray that should our eyes meet again so shall our hearts

Please write back or call
I love you

Lost Love Letter Four

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loves the church 
and gave Himself for her…husbands ought to love their own wives 
as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself…For this 
reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his 
wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
- Ephesians 5: 25-31


Hey

I hoped you would have called me on Father’s Day
It would have been nice to hear your voice
Father’s Day will always be hard for me
but I thought about my Dad a lot
and what he would think of what’s happened between you and me

My Dad loves you
He loves you as he would his own daughters
This is how he loved and loves
He wanted me to find a good woman 
from a good family that loves me and treats me well
He knows you are all of that to me and more

I’ve told you that I promised my Dad
I would always take care of my family
because that’s what he wanted as well
I thought to honor and keep that promise
I had to be here with them

I realize now that I was hiding behind this and behind my family

My mom and my sisters never held me back from anything
I held myself back because I was
afraid of leaving them
afraid of failure
afraid of more pain
that I may have to go through
after losing my Dad

My family loves to have me around
but not if it causes me unhappiness
They love me more than that
That’s how they know
how much I love you
and want to be with you
because they see how unhappy I am now without you

I’ve asked you in the past
to try not to read into me
I have no ulterior motives
no hidden agendas
I tell you where I’m coming from
what I’m feeling and where I’m going

I’m coming from the mistake of thinking that I couldn’t be with you

All the reasons I had not to be with you
have no meaning to me anymore
They are replaced with more reasons
to love you and build a life with you
All the fear I have is balanced
with all the faith I’ve gained
because of you

I love you more than I will ever love anyone else
There is no doubt or hidden meaning in that
No words could ever be more true than when I tell you I love you

I know you have reasons to doubt this
to not trust me or believe what I tell you
I know I gave you those reasons
because of what I’ve put you through
If I could take all those things back
that gave you those reasons
I would
You know I would
All I can do now is
tell you that I'm sorry
ask you to forgive me and
ask if you would have faith in me

Faith that lets you believe I've changed
and will do all the things I promised and will promise to you
Faith that lets you believe my words are heartfelt and have integrity
and that I can be with you no matter where life takes us

Faith that leads you to trusting me again and then God willing leads you back to loving me

I put my faith in God to help me through this
and now God has become as important as you wanted him to be in my life
just as you have become as important as you wanted to be in my life

I also put my faith in my Dad
remembering what he taught me and
that he will continue to guide me

My Dad would want me to be with you
knowing that you are my true happiness
He would have done anything and gone anywhere for my Mom
just as your Dad and Mom do for each other
That is the kind of love that I have for you


I’m sorry I didn’t hear you and find this faith sooner
I love you with the love I have for God and the love I learned from my Dad and our parents

and I have faith in you
that you’ll hear the side of you that has faith in me
so we can find a way back to our love

Please write back or call
I love you