Through The Eyes of Parkinson's

It used to be I would  get up feeling great
In everything I said and did
Now it seems that all I want
Is just to lie here in my bed

My body aches my bones re stiff 
My head feels like it’s in a drift
It’s hard to stand, I can’t sit still 
I can’t do anything at will

I remember how it used to be
A young girl dancing clear and free
With all the strength of a bear
Now it’s hard to run my fingers through my hair

I have to think before I talk
I have to think before I walk
I’m not the same and yet I am
I take my meds and drift to 
Visit Per Pan

I’ve come to terms with what I have
And hope and pray that it won’t last
That in my lifetime they will find
A cure some hope or extra time

To be the person I once was
To dance be free and full of love

What Happened to Me?

What happened to me? To the girl I once knew
The one with the body who smelled like the dew
So sleek and so slender and full of appeal
I can tell, if you listen my story is real

It was inconspicuous, hiding at first
In the shadows, just waiting for its time to emerge
No signs no reason to worry
Just tired and achy and sometimes I’d hurt

What happened to me? I really don’t know
How long will it last? Forever, I’m told
Since the day I can down with this dreadful disease
It has its own name, they call it PD

What happened to me?  I can’t really say
My body has changed so that in fact
I hide when the mirror and I meet or cross paths
I’m not ashamed of the reflection I see
I just can’t get over what happened to me

What happened to me is that this disease
Has taken over my body and done what its pleased
With my brain my senses, back, hands and knees
My systems have slowed to almost a stop
But my body won’t let it, it keeps fighting back

As long as I can I won’t give it up
For the struggle is long and the heartaches allot
I don’t understand what happened to me
I don’t understand, Can you tell me please

In Nineteen Hundred and Ninety Nine

The Year was nineteen hundred and ninety nine
When I thought that for sure my life was just fine
I sat in his office, my mind in cloud nine
What was the purpose of my being on time?

The exam was quite short as he turned and he said
You have the first stages of a chronic disease”
How could that be! I cried in disbelief
How could I develop this thing called PD?

I looked out of the window
At the beautiful sky
Then I turned to my doctor
And I started to cry

Bewildered I was as he kept telling me
Don’t worry it’s scary, we’ll get through it
You just wait and see

Five years have passed since the doctor told me
This is for life; do not let it consume you
Or let it control, the person you are the one that I know

Live your life to the fullest, be happy and free
You will see for yourself that in time you will be
Able to cope with this thing called PD

Self Reflection

As I look into the mirror
A reflection I do see
Of once a charming creature
Who stares and looks at me

As I look into the endless glass
And wonder to myself
What did she expect to see?
Maybe someone else?

What was really all the fuss about?
The annoyance that she sees
In this person once before her
In the body that’s not free

Of the pain of all her muscles
And the aches of all her joints
Of all the things that keep her going
Oh tell me, what’s the point?

With no where to go
To get some relief
From the after affects
Of this retched disease

But the mirror holds the answer
To the ending that she needs
For this poem of self reflection
Is the way that she perceives?

My Friend and I

We are the same my friend and I 
Seems though we could be twins
Sharing in life what we don’t want
Which lives in us within? 

It tares at us though it were
Looking to take away
A life of love and precious time
But she and I keep fighting back

Distance and time have played their part
In keeping us away
For certain we are that one day we’ll meet
If not on earth, but heavens gate

My friend and I were destined to be
Friends for life in every way
A friend you want to always keep
A friend that’s here to stay

A friend that’s always with you
And never walks away

When In Doubt

When in doubt try to perceive
Try and imagine yourself if you please
Just for a day, if you were me
Give it a try and see how you feel

When in doubt
Try to smile with no expression
When in doubt
Try to walk without a stumble
When in doubt
Try to speak
Without a mumble
When in doubt
Try to breathe a normal breath
Or just sit down and take a rest
When in doubt
Try to swallow and not choke
When in doubt
Try to write with comprehension
Then sit still and at attention
When in doubt
Try to cry without a tear
Try to do this without fear
When in doubt
Try to sit as still as can be
Then you’ll know how it is for me

When in doubt try to perceive
How did it feel for you to be me?
Now try to imagine if you would please
What it felt like to have this disease

The Waiting Room

I heard them conversing
A mother and child
The mother was sick
The child in denial

It seems so unfair
That we should depend
On children who care
When convenient to them

She would ask a question
The response would be rude
“Just sit down and be quiet
I’m not speaking with you”

I wanted to rush
Confront with the child
Time would not let me
I did not know how

Tell your mother you love her
And show her you care
For maybe tomorrow
She would not be there

To tell here it’s alright
For her to be ill
So please don’t ignore her
For she needs your help still

Then I started to wonder
And ask myself too
If that would be me
Depending on you

Would you ignore what I said?
And not listen to me
Would you respect what I told you?
And just let me be

There Are Days

There are days that I take part in life
With ample time and ease
There are days that I take part in life
With a struggle when I freeze

There are days when you can’t notice
The tremor of my hand
There are days when you can’t notice
The way I walk and stand

There are days that I could function
As though I never had PD
With the ease of every step I take
Like walking in the breeze

These days are now becoming
More difficult for me
I noticed it the other day
When I tried to sit and read

The days I truly love my friends,
Are the days you give to me
Of making me feel wanted
And allowing me to be

The person that I truly am,
Who lives inside of me

When All Hope is Gone

Lately it seems, all hope is gone
Really no reason to try to go on
When life itself, is filled with despair
Taking great effort to feel like I care

When family and friends, seem to all disappear
Leaving your life in a shambles and you all in tears

When everything seems 
As though nothing goes right
You slowly begin to loose what’s in sight

Take some time to reflect on the past
When life was much better, and not a big drag
Remember the friends who were always there	
The ones that loved you in times of despair

Try hard to remember the times that you had 
The events, sadness and even the laughs
Think hard and remember when all seems unfair
The friends that you loved and showed they all cared